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Lustful Living- How to Deal with Sexual Desires

lustful living- how to deal with sexual desires

Lust. It just sounds bad. Before you even know what it is or fully understand it, the word alone doesn’t make it seem like it’s something good. That look you have as someone is walking past you. That ‘dazed’ look. That’s lust. Sharing a joke that leads your mind as well as others minds straight to the gutter, that’s lust. Hanging with a girlfriend or boyfriend and things get a little ‘hot and heavy,’ that’s lust. Are you following me now?

Lust is a strong sexual desire that can lead many young people, Christian or unsaved, down the wrong path. Let’s recall the story of King David and Bathsheba. It is often told very one sided. David saw her, called for her, slept with her, got her pregnant, devised a plan, and killed her husband. But Bathsheba played a part. She allowed lust to be part of her life which led to her pregnancy, trying to trick her husband, and eventually his death. Also, the baby conceived out of this lust, died.

Uncontrolled sexual desires only leads to death.

Speaking of one-sided stories, our Christian brothers have made it clear that they struggle with lust. Lecrae‘s ‘Killa’, Trip Lee‘s ‘Covenant Eyes’, and DJ Wade-O‘s open struggle show us that men struggle with lust. It was once believed that men thought about sex every 7 seconds.

But *clears throat* the ladies struggle too! Now, personally, I think that more women should openly talk about their struggles. It seems that a female sexual struggle is almost as taboo as the word ‘sex’ in the church. But it is not immodest or distasteful as you may be led to believe. Admitting to a lust problem does not make her any less of a great Christian woman. It is a sin struggle like any other struggle with the flesh.

So now that we know everyone struggles with lust in one way or another, it may not be your #1 sin, but it’s on your list. For some, it may be the biggest problem in their lives. Daily they live with lust. But how can you not let these sexual desires get the best of you?

1. Face your problem.

Stop telling yourself that those ‘daydreams’ are just imaginations. No, it’s lust taking over your mind and you’re letting it. It’s more than just a few pictures texted from your girlfriend or boyfriend, it’s lust taking over your conversations. You have to admit to the problem in order to deal with it. You can’t fight the enemy you won’t face. It’s an honor to be able to fight for Christ. If it requires you to say to yourself ‘Lust, you cannot have my mind’ daily, do it! You have to be willing to admit the problems and take the necessary steps toward The Solution. God is not letting you struggle alone. He’s always there. He wants to help you overcome sin, but you have to want to as well.

2. Forget the past.

Your past does not determine your future. So what, you fell to lust yesterday, this morning, an hour ago. Get up, dust yourself off, and try again. Repent for your wrong doing and do not live a defeated life because you messed up. God doesn’t love you any less. His grace is sufficient! His grace was made for our weakness. But God does not saying ‘It’s not ok to mess up.’ He knows we will mess up. (This does not mean sin on purpose.) It’s not ok not to get up. Give your guilt and shame to Christ, then use your experience as a stepping stone. (See Psalm 51) Allow Him to help you conquer your flesh. He was in situations just like you were, but did not sin. Look to Him for hope!

3. Fight honestly and often.

Once you have faced your problems and let your past go, you have to be ready and willing to fight your flesh. Not just fight, but fight honestly. Ladies, don’t go watch pick-up games at the park if you can’t handle it. You know the guys are playing shirts vs skins. Fellas, don’t hang out at Hooters when you don’t have to put your mind through that. Be honest with yourself and with what you can handle in order to be pro-active. We live in a very sex-driven culture, so be ready to oppose lust often. I can’t speak for everyone, but it seems like every time you are minding your own business, you see something, hear something, think something out of left field. You have two options now that your mind has been distracted. 1. Focus on it. 2. Fight it. Your mind is a battlefield. Make the right choice.

‘Sex is a big tripping point for a lot of Christians.’– Hayley DiMarco

I must agree with the author of Technical Virgin, Hayley DiMarco. Sex starts with lust. You just don’t decide to have sex with someone you haven’t thought about having sex with. Stop the thought, and you can stop the action. Sexual sins, including homosexuality, have their root with lust. For some it is a daily battle, while for others it is an hourly battle, but either way it is a battle you can win.

Christian, God is on your side! He didn’t ‘set you up’ to be tempted, but He does set you up to win. Know that you will be tested. I cannot lie to you and say that you will pass every test with flying colors. You will fail at times. Learn from your mistakes. Take the necessary precautions to protect yourself from yourself. Lust is an internal battle. Take responsibility and win.

Ed. Note: We strongly recommend that anyone who struggles with sexual sin, particularly on the internet, should use a service like Covenant Eyes (Affiliate link) for accountability. I use them on every device that I own and it helps keep me honest even when I don’t want to be honest. Our affiliate code, WadeORadio, allows you to try the first month free of charge. You can find out more about covenant eyes here. – Wade


How do you handle lust?

Purchase Hayley DiMarco’s Technical Virgin: How Far is Too Far? (Affiliate Link)

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Rasheda Likely, originally from Pensacola, FL, finds joy in authoring bi-weekly devotional blogs, spearheading advertising efforts, and serving as secretary for The Wade-O Radio Team. While being on the TWORS team, she successfully completed a Bachelors of Science in Biology and began her studies for a Masters of Science degree in Biology. Rasheda looks forward to impacting the lives of others through the ministry of TWORS the way TWORS has impacted hers.

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